Sounds of Lorne Street

I can hear my across the street neighbor laughing. And laughing and laughing. Earlier today I heard her two year old shouting/singing "bye bye... bye bye..." over and over to someone walking down the street or maybe to his sister. I love this street.

TODAY I TOOK A SHOWER. It feels like a huge accomplishment. I'm very proud. For five whole days not bathing was perfect. No part of me thought bathing would be a good idea. I didn't even smell bad. I changed some parts of my clothes sometimes. I washed my hair twice. But I didn't even sponge bathe. It just didn't seem necessary. But today it was time. I woke up this morning, smelled my smell, and was very excited that it was Shower Day. All day I've been telling everyone. It's hilarious. I feel like a toddler saying, "Mommy! Guess what? I peed all by myself today!!!" Except I'm telling EVERYONE. And I didn't even do it all by myself. I actually had a lot of help. But it still took very much effort on my part, and I'm very proud of myself.

Plus I feel great. So clean. All day I've just been enjoying my nice, clean skin.

I'm getting a bit more of what being a toddler is like. I find myself saying, over and over,
"I can do it myself." Like when someone offers to help me take my pants off, "I can do it myself." Or get into bed, "I can do it myself." Or hold my water glass, "I can do it myself." I understand, people offer to help toddlers because it's a little faster when someone else does it, and a little less messy. But I also understand being the toddler. There's a lot of pride in being able to say, "I can do it myself." Or even just, "Do it self!" Or, "Toni do it." I don't want to be fussed over.

I'm also understanding something about babies. Why they need to be burped. Maybe someone else knows more about this and you can educate me. But what I'm noticing is that burping is something that happens when you're vertical. For that reason, adults don't need help burping. Neither do children. Just babies, because they spend lots of time horizontal. I've been noticing this. I'm mostly horizontal. And sometimes my tummy hurts. And then I'll get up to pee, and as soon as I get upright I burp. And feel much better. Very interesting.

I just went downstairs to get an ice pack, and then happened to run into some ice cream while I was in the freezer. How does one carry ice pack and ice cream on crutches? No problem. The ice pack gets strapped onto my boot. (See yesterday's picture.) The spoon spoon goes in my mouth. Easy. And the pint of Haagen-Dazs coffee? Simple. Just tuck it in the waistband of my pants! Then crutch over to the stairs, and scoot up on my butt, and slip up onto my rolling stool, and roll back to bed.

And then, as I was sitting here eating ice cream and blogging, something nice happened. My neighbor came in to ask if I wanted my "garbages" taken out. I said no thank you because my friend already put it out this morning. And he said, "No, your garbageS, like the ones in your house." Oh! How sweet of him to think of that! Again I said No Thank You, but I'm glad you stopped by because I'd like you to put this ice cream back in the freezer please.

And then his wife came over and he said, "Toni just took this ice cream out of her pants and gave it to me." And she laughed. The same laugh I was hearing as I started this post.

I'm telling you, this has been a BIG day. I mean, the showering is just part of it. Also, after the shower I put on clean clothes. And then, just now, I did something I haven't done in an entire week - I put pajamas on. I've just been wearing the same clothes, day in and day out, wake and sleep - all of it happening in bed. But tonight I felt motivated to wear pajamas during moon time, and I'll put some day clothes on in the morning to greet the sun. Also, I made myself breakfast today. WHEW! That was Some Hard Work. Really. I'm pretty sure I expended more calories making it than I consumed eating it. And I shed a few tears. Just from the frustration of it all. I also got a massage today. Which might not sound too challenging, BUT IT WAS. Well, the eating and the bathing leading up to it were much of the challenge. But then just climbing up on the massage table was hard. The massage was nice. But then I felt like crap afterwards. Likely because all the drugs I've been taking the last week, and all the stress and trauma I've been experiencing were all brought up and released and mixed around and messed with. I came home and slept for two hours. And then woke up with a bad headache and stomachache. And, yes, I AM drinking lots of water.

My biggest news of the day, though, is this. I've decided to quit the drugs. No more Percocet. And as of now, no more Vicodin. Beginning tomorrow, or whenever I wake up tonight in pain - I'm strictly a Tylenol and Ibuprofen girl. I'm hoping that some of the nausea and dizziness will cease. I'm hoping the pain won't be too bad.

This has been a good day. My one regret is this: I wanted to go the police station to clear my name, but didn't have time. I still have nine more days to pull that off. Maybe I can get a ride on Monday.